In the last 6 months a lot has changed for me, I’ve not felt really like myself for such a long time, and now everything is becoming clear and I feel like I’m seeing life again with fresh eyes. Each day something new pops up, something else that makes me just want more from life. An ill relative, a change beyond my control, or simply a piece of inspiration.
I don’t want to settle, I want to be proud of myself and at the moment that’s not how I feel. It’s not enough for me to just make do with something and for some people that’s ok, that’s what they’re happy with, but for me I just want more. Always a dreamer, a planner but a realist. Life’s just too short to carry on plodding along and I truly believe that if you work hard enough all your dreams will come true. Cheesy, I know.
The thing is, I think sometimes in life you’re not quite sure what you want and it can take a long time to figure that out.
I’ve recently turned down opportunities that just over 6 months ago really mattered to me, and it’s not that those opportunities don’t matter to me now, because a part of me knows that they do. A part of me does wonder why I didn’t say yes, but in my heart I know that it’s not right for me anymore and I know I’d regret not taking a leap, just to see if I could fly.